If I had to name my disability, I would call it an unwillingness to fall ... This reluctance signals the mistrust of the central truth of the Christian gospel: life springs from death, not only at the last but also in the many little deaths along the way. When everything you count on for protection has failed, the Divine Presence does not fail. The hands are still there -- not promising to rescue, not promising to intervene -- promising only to hold you no matter how far you fall.~ Barbara Brown Taylor ~
from her book Leaving Church: A Memoir of Faith
Today, I experienced a divine gift through a friend--an answer to prayer, even. I am grateful. Immensely grateful. Yesterday I said, "I hope tomorrow is a better day." It was.
I sometimes hesitate to speak about what I need--for a lot of reasons. Partly out of privacy. Partly because I don't want to sound like I am whining or complaining. Partly because I am self-protective. And more. Those are the big ones.
Here's one of the lessons I learned today: If I don't speak up (at least occasionally) so that the people around me know what is going on, it makes it harder for God to use them to answer my prayers. It's easier to collaborate than to create from thin air.
I still have no guarantee of what is coming down the road. However, today looks a little brighter and I am glad of it.