Wednesday, February 03, 2010

a list i wish i'd written*

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer's history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How in the world are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to the ten-page paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -- ever.

15. I hate it when I miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?) but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" Just how do I respond to that?

19. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

20. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with a Budweiser than Kay.

*sent to me by a friend who didn't know the author either


Joan said...

Who among us would not be able to identify with at least some of these!?

tds said...

In an effort to avoid real work, I did a little searching and found this site where it appears that most of these originated:


Carrie Wilson Link said...

I wish I'd written that list, too! This one is my favorite: "7. Map Quest needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood."

sierramadre said...

If I followed Map Quest's directions for getting out of my neighborhood, I would end up on a deadend street!

Kapuananiokalaniakea said...

Great list. Do I have any volunteers for the job of computer clearer?
And yes, that moment in an argument when you realize you are wrong totally sucks...not that I have any personal knowledge of any such moments.

Karen L R said...

what a riot!

Deb Shucka said...

My favorites: the sarcasm font and the mapquest one. What a fun list.