Wednesday, August 19, 2009

get real

(mijo)

I thought that being faithful was about becoming someone other than who I was, in other words, and it was not until this project failed that I began to wonder if my human wholeness might be more useful to God than my exhausting goodness.

~ Barbara Brown Taylor ~

Leaving Church


I was in junior high. We were on the school bus ride home. A boy I was interested in had a book about auto mechanics so I asked him about it.

"What's your book about? Pieces of cars?" Partly, I was trying to be amusing--partly, I was pretending to know less than I knew, because everyone knows that boys like girls who aren't as smart as they are. (Don't they?)

He laughed at me--mocked me. "Pieces of cars! They're car 'parts'!" I knew that.

His derision hurt me. And that was the last time I dumbed down. I am not good at pretending to be other than who I am (except when I am on stage playing a role--then I am pretty darn good, if I do say so myself).

If I can't pretend in order to fit in with people, how could I possibly be other than who I am with God?

7 comments:

Joan said...

Haven't we all done that? No more. Let them take me as I am or not at all. We each have self worth just as we are. God knows what we are and loves us that way. If it is good enough for God it is good enough for the humans in our lives.

Anonymous said...

what a lovely photo of the cat!

stephanie said...

I completely agree with you. Never dumb yourself down. I did that for a long time and finally said, this is silly. Now I feel good to know what I know and to know what I don't know, so that I can always learn. It's good to surround yourself with people that appreciate who you are and encourage you to always be your best.

Sidenote: The espresso machine I have is great. It's a little tricky and is a little slower because it's manual, but really, I love it. Plus it is compact enough that I don't have to worry about storing it. I'm excited to keep using it and improve my technique with it.

Susan O'Neil said...

I've pasted today's posting on my bathroom mirror. I'm really struggling with the pain of rejection that i'm getting by being my true self. I know there's no turning back and i knew that there would be some rejection but i guess i didn't fully comprehend how much.
On a happy note, I finally figured out how to get my name to appear when i comment!

Wanda said...

Susan...

Ouch. Sorry to hear about your pain and rejection. And...congratulations on being your true self. It's worth it in the long run. Truly.

Operaton You said...

Our real authentic selves are much more beautiful, real, loving, prosperous with joy anyway! Why not be true to ourselves...Our trueness IS God!

christina said...

powerful and love filled post. i love me, way too much to play dumb. no way.
xoxo